Crossing Bridges
by toobeauty
Summary: Hephaestion is at that turning point in his life and life will depend on that single decision.
1. To cross or not to cross

_**Sorry for not answering your comments, my internet connection went down for some days and now it is almost working 24/7.**_

_**This started as a standalone but it grew into a mini series. Hope you enjoy it!**_

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><p><em><strong>To cross or not to cross.<strong>_

"What are you doing here on the bridge, Hephaestion? Admiring your own work?" asked Ptolemy to the brunette standing in the middle of his latest construction.

"No my friend, I am not that vain" answered Hephaestion with his head down casted.

"So what are you doing?" the blonde asked again.

"Taking a decision" the brunette murmured.

"And that is?" Ptolemy asked, trying to get an answer.

"To cross or not to cross" Hephaestion replied without giving much more information.

"Sometimes you speak like in riddles; this is one of those occasions" said Ptolemy desperately.

"The bridge, Ptolemy, to cross or not to cross the bridge" Hephaestion's voice was a bit harder.

"But in the way you are facing, it would imply going back to Macedon, wouldn't it?" he asked with fear.

"You are right" Hephaestion accompanied the words with an imperceptible nod.

"And why would you like to go back to Macedon, Hephaestion?"

"Because someone wise once told "_If someone you love hurts you, cry a river, build a bridge and get over it"_ I won't cry a river having such a nice water course here, I have already built my bridge, my lover had hurt me deadly so by crossing it, I'd be getting over it" said Hephaestion with a very tiny voice; nearly whispering his explanation.

"But why? What happened? What has he done?" asked Ptolemy with worry in his voice and face.

"Nothing than the usual, he is just being Alexander; but I am tired, Ptolemy. I believed that we would always be together, as when we were young, but he has changed and I haven't. **I should have realized long ago that no one is ever meant to possess the sun. "**

**TBC**


	2. Crossing

_**Crossing.**_

Ptolemy knew that Hephaestion was right, Alexander had been acting quite unusually lately, coming and going everywhere with the Persian eunuch and listening to Cassander more than the logic found reasonable.

He had also seen tiredness in his friend's blue eyes and a tiny pang of pain every time his eyes landed onto the king's frame.

He would support whatever decision Hephaestion would take and even help him with its outcome.

So when Hephaestion told Ptolemy that he would finally cross the bridge, the blonde felt his heart heavy because he was on the verge of losing his best friend but happy enough to wish him good luck.

Hephaestion decided to leave Alexander unaware of his decision until the last moment because he knew that his king would try anything to make him change his mind.

The Army was ready to set off at dawn and Hephaestion would cross the bridge at the same time but in the opposite direction.

So the night before the departure, once the banquet was nearly over, Hephaestion approached Alexander and asked if he could have a word with him. Alexander found the situation funny because Hephaestion was really serious and had been quite distant in the last days.

He told Alexander about his decision to go back to Macedon. The king asked him which his reasons were and so Hephaestion, for the first time ever, told him a blatant lie. He said that he was feeling tired and that he had never fully recovered from his last wounds and that, due to them, he was in constant pain.

Alexander looked at him with empty eyes and just said that he should do that and turning round he went back to the banquet, leaving a former Macedonian General even more sure of the decision taken.

TBC


	3. Crossing to a new life

_**Crossing to a new life.**_

Hephaestion went back to his chamber and finished organizing his belongings. One by one, his most loyal friends came to see him and the brunette gave to each of them a gift so they could remember him.

Good wishes were said and goodbyes were exchanged quickly, trying not to make this agony longer.

When dawn came, Hephaestion went out to load his own cart while the rest of the companions were attending the last meeting before the soon departure. Hephaestion's place was empty and Alexander mentioned, as if it were unimportant, Hephaestion's decision to leave the Army that day and forever.

Ptolemy saw with disgust how many of his own brothers in arms were enjoying the news and showing his happy faces. Many were already thinking about the benefits they would get now that the brunette was out of their way; others were thinking which of them would occupy the brunette's former position, not only among the companions but also in Alexander's bed. Ptolemy glanced at Cleitus, one of the brunette's hardest detractors, and saw surprise in his hard features and cold black eyes but he couldn't guess if it was due to the news, totally unexpected for most of them, or the way that Alexander had said that news as if he did not care about Hephaestion anymore and he was already part of his past.

As soon as the meeting was over and the companions dismissed, Alexander sat back on his chair and messed his blonde mane, grabbing his long tresses among his fingers and pulling them tight. He looked at the empty place his former lover had left vacant that day and sighed deeply. He knew he had to go out and face Hephaestion's departure with a mature attitude but he also knew that he would not be able to do it. It hurt too much to see him go but it was the best for him, Hephaestion had been feeling uncomfortable lately and Alexander realized that his dreams might be now only his and not theirs as they used to be. What he did not realize was that Hephaestion's decision was more related to him as his lover than as his King.

Hephaestion was surrounded by his former men, who were asking him question after question about his future plans and the brunette answered all of them patiently. A pregnant moment occurred when the king approached the gathered men but Hephaestion didn't realize about it because the king was at the back of the group. Alexander listened to Hephaestion telling that his last command, if he was still allowed to do that, was that they would have to be good and loyal to their king, taking care of him as if he were still there, commanding them and fighting beside them. Seeing the men nodding made Hephaestion feel relieved because he had trained his men well and they would honour his latest order.

Hephaestion lifted his teary gaze and his eyes found the king's that were looking back at them. A shout of "Get ready to march, you lazy lot" from Craterous's mouth and directed to Hephaestion's men broke the spell and so the men moved and Alexander made a beeline to his former lover.

"May the Olympians grant you a long and healthy life, Hephaestion " said the king embracing his brunette tightly and breathing against his neck to catch Hephaestion's unique smell for the last time.

Alexander turned round quickly and started to walk fast, without giving time to his former General to answer him back, and crossed the bridge to a new life … away from his Phai.

TBC


	4. Crossing roads

_**Crossing roads.**_

It had been four years since Hephaestion had left the Macedonian Army and he had missed his former life every day of those last four years. Nevertheless, he could not tell that his life was bad, it wasn't but … it wasn't what he wanted either. Something was missing but he didn't dare to think about that. What he didn't know was that he was about to cross roads with his biggest fear very soon.

His return to Macedon had provoked quite a revolution, women asking when their husbands or lovers were coming back; children asking him if he knew where their fathers were or if they were brave warriors. The first two weeks were chaotic but Hephaestion, with his endless patience, weathered the storm successfully.

He reopened his childhood farm house again and began rebuilding the parts that needed it the most. His skills at building huge constructions were more than useful for a medium size house. The farm lands were cultivated because he had hired some farmers to keep them fertile and producing crops.

As soon as he arrived, the farmers appeared to ask him timidly for time to look for another place to live and work. Hephaestion told them that he had no intention to make them leave but if that was their wish he would have to look for other farmers to look after the lands. They decided to stay and they soon realized that the former General was a very generous man and he knew a lot about plants, seeds and herbs. One of the women approached him one afternoon to ask him if he would teach her more about healing herbs and let her start a garden for them. Hephaestion was happy to teach her and she proved to be a quick student. She praised her for being a good learner and she said that it was because he was a very good teacher. The former General blushed as a teenager.

Spring turned quickly into summer and that brought long and hot days. He used to enjoy going to a nearby lake and refreshed himself there after working all day long. Summer went by and autumn appeared with its cloudy days and leaving his beautiful trees without their green leaves, soon replaced by brownish ones and when winter arrived the trees were completely devoid of leaves at all.

A whole year had already gone by when one early spring day, after working all day long on the new roof, Hephaestion was sat down on a chair in the front garden, drinking some water when a girl, no older than three summers, asked him if he knew how to write. He smiled and told her that he could. The girl ran away, leaving an astonished Hephaestion there. Some minutes later, the little girl appeared again with a scroll and a stylus and asked him if he could write her name on that. He smiled again and asked what her name was, she said her name was Alexia and the brunette felt a shiver travelled along his spine. He had crossed many times with news about Alexander but in the last four years he had never written his name once. His hand trembled when he began writing it but he told off himself, and did it without hesitation.

The girl's eyes gleamed with joy and in that moment he realized the reason of the little girl's name, she had one eye grey and the other green, just like Alexander but her hair was jet black and straight.

She set her two coloured eyes onto his cerulean ones and he suddenly found himself with an armful of the dark-haired girl. Alexia lifted her tiny hand and rubbed her fingers along Hephaestion's stubbed cheek caressing it happily. After that, she pecked that same cheek with her wet lips. Hephaestion looked at her and smiled broadly; the little girl had captured his soul and lightened the weight of his heart.

From that day on, the little Alexia came to visit Hephaestion every day of that week and spent many hours with him, especially when he was working in the garden. She was constantly asking him about stories and his travels with the king, a person she really admired because, she had confessed sheepishly, he was like the sun with his blonde hair and they shared the same eye colour, a fact that was rather unique. In the beginning it was painful for the young man but then he learnt to remember those years without feeling pain or regret but happiness.

One day after that first week, a young woman appeared at his door and asked if he was Hephaestion. He said he was and asked who she was in return; she was Alexia's mother and she wanted to thank him because her little girl had regained her life wish since she met him. The woman explained that her husband had died from an incurable illness the previous winter. He used to spend long hours telling his little daughter stories and the day he died he had promised to teach her to write her name. Hephaestion realized why that was the first thing she had asked him to write for her.

After that day, they talked frequently but nothing happened between them. Hephaestion started to think if something was wrong with him because he had not been with anyone for the last two years. He couldn't say that he had not had opportunities but he had never accepted any of the offers. It seemed as if his heart was denying him an opportunity to start again and his body was in complot with his heart.

Winter came earlier that third year and more severe than he could remember. He had not been able to work outside for long because it was really cold and after some time, he could not feel his fingers and toes. He had missed Alexia's visits, the little girl was four years old at the moment, but he knew that if it was so cold it was not advisable to go out. However, he decided to visit her the following day and see if they needed his help.

The sun had just set down when he heard a light knock at his door. He thought who had dared to go out with that weather so he hurried to open the door and let the visitor it. To his surprise, his visitor was his little friend, she was panicking because she could not wake up her mother. Hephaestion took a warm and heavy blanket and wrapped Alexia with it; the little girl was shivering a lot and her little feet were bluish. After taking care of her, he went to the stable and took his loyal Auburn out and the three of them went towards Alexia's house.

As soon as Hephaestion saw the young woman, he realized what the problem was; the purple hue of her skin told him about a massive stroke provoking her sudden death; at least she had not suffered.

The brunette turned round to look at Alexia, knelt and opening his arms widely he hugged the little body tightly against his broad chest. Fat tears fell from those two coloured eyes when the little girl realized that her mother was not waking up again. He kept hugging her until her sobs and tears subsided. He sat on the floor and explained that he should take care of her mother's body so she should go with one of her neighbours until he finished. She nodded but as soon as he left her in the neighbour's house, she started to call his name. He went back and promised that when he finished, he would come back. The little girl grabbed his leather pants tightly until he promised for Aphrodite's sweet breath that he was coming back. Alexia sat behind the closed door and waited there without moving an inch and the old woman, looking after her, could see that the girl was repeating the former oath on the goddess's name.

Hephaestion came back later and asked the woman if she knew if Alexia had any other relatives; the old lady said that there was anyone else but that she would gladly bring her up. Alexia turned her little face and looked at Hephaestion with those eyes and he could see the hidden plea in them. Sighing deeply, he thanked the old woman but told her that he would look after her and she was invited to visit them whenever she wanted. The old woman smiled tenderly, she knew the girl had a soft spot for the handsome man. Those two would be good together and for each other.

Man and girl returned to the farm house and Hephaestion started to think what had made him take that decision. The answer came suddenly when he remembered another time, three years ago, when he had taken a radical decision because he wanted to be needed and loved truly.

He tucked Alexia into his bed and he sat on a comfortable couch by her side, looking as the breathing became softer, indicating that she had finally fallen asleep. He should have fallen asleep too but he was woken up by a loud cry; Alexia was having a nightmare and he did automatically what he used to do whenever Alexander had his, he sat the little girl onto his lap and hugged her tight, rocking back and forwards and whispering comfort words in her ear.

The girl opened her eyes, filled up to the brim with tears, and hugged him back with her short arms and cried, leaving a wet patch on his chiton. After some minutes, she fell into a deep slumber due to her heavy sobbing and when Hephaestion tried to lay her down on the bed again, it dawned on him that he couldn't because Alexia had her tiny hands turned into fists grabbing his chiton. He went back to the couch, covered both of them with a fur blanket and fell asleep together there.

Morning came and Alexia woke up with a tiny smile when she discovered he was in her friend's arms but truth hit harder seconds later reminding her of her mum's death. Low sobs began again and even though she tried to stop them, she couldn't. A strong hand started to move up and down along her small back and a soothing feeling filled her mourning heart. She lifted her head and found two sad cerulean eyes looking back at her and she immediately felt lips on her forehead and whispers that assured her that everything was going to be fine.

It took nearly three months for the little Alexia to start feeling better; she still had her sad moments but, as Hephaestion had taught her, she replaced each of them with one happy moment shared with her parents. She began secretly replacing some of those sad moments with happy ones shared with Hephaestion, who she admired and loved too much.

She began doing some things around the house, helping Hephaestion with little chores such as carrying water, fetching eggs or sweeping the floors. One summer day, she discovered herself singing and laughed loudly making Hephaestion smiled broadly.

Some summer afternoons were spent on the lake where Hephaestion taught her how to swim and he retold the story about how he had taught King Alexander how to swim too. She stopped her movements for a while, and grabbing his arm, she asked softly:

"Why did you leave him … papa?"

Hephaestion froze for some seconds; that "papa" had sounded so needy but he couldn't deny the warm feeling invading his heart. He took a deep breath and answered:

"Because it was the best for both of us"

"Did you love him?" she asked again boldly and happy because he had subtlety accepted his title of papa.

"Yes, but he didn't" he answered, feeling a stubbing pain in his heart.

"I love you, papa. You are my father now, aren't you?" she asked, needing a verbal confirmation of her heart's deepest desire.

"Yes, I am, as long as you want me to be that" replied the young man with his eyes a bit wet.

"Forever papa" she said smiling broadly.

"And one day more" he said, grabbing his little "daughter" between his strong arms and hugged her tenderly.

Days went by and the end of the summer was near. Hephaestion decided to take Alexia to the nearest city to buy bigger warm clothes; she had grown quite tall in the last months and he suspected that her clothes would not fit her anymore. He was not too much fond of going to another place to buy his supplies but they didn't have in their town what they needed.

They departed early one morning and arrived there one hour later. The open market in the street had, at least fifty stalls, and some of them had exotic goods. They bought what they needed and then they strolled along the different stalls, admiring the goods. Alexia set her eyes onto the drag dolls, her only doll had been ripped apart by a stray dog that had entered the garden. Hephaestion saw her eyes and made a sign to the merchant to show her some of them. The young merchant was staring at him and he finally dared to ask him if he was Hephaestion Amyntoros. When he nodded, the youth smiled broadly and offered the little girl his best and biggest doll, telling her it was his gift for her. Father and daughter asked "Why?" at the same time and the young man answered "Because your father had saved my father's life". Both of them thanked the merchant and a very happy Alexia hugged her new doll and loved her brave father even more.

They were ready to come back when Hephaestion realized that he had forgotten some supplies. He left Alexia on Auburn and told his daughter to wait for him there and to his faithful mare to look after her.

She was looking at her new doll when she listened to many horses coming and people happily shouting a single name "Alexander Alexander". She stayed frozen on the horse, a light shiver travelled along her little frame when she thought that her father might decide to leave her and follow his king. As they were passing by, a familiar neigh made the king stop and looking at the auburn mare he whispered "Auburn". Bucephalus was stomping his front legs in front of the mare and he suddenly rubbed his nuzzle against his old friend. Alexander lifted his gaze and two coloured eyes met their same coloured partners. He swallowed deeply and asked:

"Do you know the owner of this mare?"

"He is my papa, Sire" she answered, nearly whispering.

"Can you tell me where he is" the king asked again.

"He is in there, Sire"

"Thank you. What is your name?" he asked seeing the little girl trembling a little in spite of the still warm weather.

"I am Alexia, Sire"

"Thank you, Alexia. I am Alexander" he replied and turning round, he started to walk towards the store the girl had pointed at before.

He was about to enter when Hephaestion was coming out with a high pile of goods that reached up to his head. However, the king would always recognize those hands anytime.

"Let me help you, Phai" he said with a tiny and deep voice.

And Hephaestion felt his heart crumble to the floor as well as all his goods. He stood there, unmovable, looking at his king, who was also still in his place, as if he were nailed to the floor. They moved together and fell into each other arms, hugging tightly.

Alexander nuzzled his former's lover scent and whispered in his ear:

"I have missed you so much, Phai"

"So have I, Alex"

"I met your little girl, she is gorgeous" he added, ending the embrace but without releasing Hephaestion's forearms.

"Yes, she is; she is also a nice girl" Hephaestion replied with pride in his voice.

"That is really nice, Hephaestion. So have you found your place in the world?" asked the king softly.

"I think I have"

"It's been four long years" Alexander added, looking at his former lover and trying to imprint his image in his mind forever.

"Yes, and may I ask what you are doing here, so far away from your beloved East" Hephaestion asked and he could not mask his snarky tone.

"I wanted to see home before I …" and he was interrupted by Hephaestion when he said

"Before you go on conquering more territory"

Alexander did not answer but he looked at Hephaestion with sad eyes.

"I'd better let you go back to your family" said the king, releasing his forearms with a light squeeze.

Hephaestion did not correct Alexander, he simply smiled that tiny smile of his, the one only reserved to Alexander, and greeted him, wishing his king health. The brunette did not see Alexander's wince at his last word and he did not see the tiny sad smile on his face when he saw Alexia hugging her father tenderly and hiding her little face among the long tresses.

They returned to their house in silence, one thinking about the turmoil of feelings inside his heart. He had never thought their roads would cross again and seeing him today had woken all those dormant feelings inside his heart that had been kept hidden. He realized that He was what his life was missing but he would not dare to act on it again. He had Alexia now and he was happy with her.

Meanwhile, the little girl was recalling the whole scene that happened outside the store and she had seen love in his father's eyes and also pain and she had seen love and regret in the king's eyes too. Those two men still loved each other and her father was wrong when he had said that the king hadn't loved him. She could see his endless love reaching out to touch her father and she had also seen that love crumble when the king had discovered her existence. She had to let him know that Hephaestion was still single and that she was only his adopted daughter, maybe in that way she could put a smile on their faces again.

When they finally arrived home, Hephaestion had finished with his musings and decided not to spend another second thinking about Alexander, it was his past and now he had a new life with a beautiful daughter and even though his life was not what he had expected, he would never cross that road because … if he reached to Alexander again, he would die as soon as he left for his next conquest.

He had crossed the bridge to a new life and he was not going backwards … or that was what he thought …

Time would prove him wrong soon …

TBC


	5. At the crossroads

_**Chapter 5: At the crossroads.**_

The days after the encounter with the king were a bit difficult but father and daughter went back to their previous relationship as soon as Alexia understood that her father would not leave her and that Hephaestion realized that he was not making the same mistake again.

Alexia's sixth birthday was coming soon and Hephaestion decided that it was time to celebrate it; the girl was feeling more than comfortable with him and the rest of their neighbours had accepted gladly his parenthood after seeing the man looking after the girl and being loved in return.

He needed to go to the town again because he had asked a woman to sew a new fur cloak and some winter clothes for Alexia; they shared the same hate for cold weather but they had learnt how to tolerate it better. As it was her birthday present, he didn't want Alexia to see it beforehand so he asked one of his neighbours to look after her for some hours. Luckily, Alexia and some friends were engaged in a game so she greeted him goodbye and promised that she would behave well.

Hephaestion rode back to the town and picked Alexia's present. On his way out, he saw the carpenter mumbling aloud, the man was one of the finest ones Hephaestion had ever meet and his work was really good.

"Joy to you, Titus" greeted the brunette.

"Eh! Ah, joy to you General" replied the big man with his eyes focused on a comfortable chair.

"No that anymore, Titus" joked Hephaestion back.

"Well, how's you little girl? Isn't she with you today?" he asked while walking around the chair.

"No, I came to pick up her birthday present. May I ask what you are doing walking around that chair?" asked Hephaestion curiously.

"A friend of mine brought a man who wanted to make some alterations to a chair but I cannot make head over feet here" said Titus scratching his beard.

"What are those alterations? I may be able to help with more ideas" suggested Hephaestion.

"That's kind of you, of course! You were the king's architect" said Titus happily.

"I am not an architect but I am good with calculations, constructions and designs" said the brunette.

"Well this man has a friend who cannot move easily, he has a strange illness acquired in the east that weakens his body muscles. He has already lost the strength in one of his legs so it is difficult for him to walk" explained Titus.

"But he could use a cane"

"The problem is that this illness will get worse and in the next few months, his other leg will stop working too. He is already using a cane but this man wants something for when the worst comes."

"You can add wheels to the chair so anyone could push it easily" said Hephaestion walking around the chair himself.

"That's a good idea but how can I attach them to the chair frame?" asked Titus.

"Bring me a scroll and something to draw, please" asked Hephaestion sitting at an old table inside the workshop.

The former General put his ideas into action and soon after a plan was created, it showed the chair with two big wheels attached to its sides, resembling a war chariot, and a handle in one of them to stop the movement and work as a kind of brake. The back rest of the chair showed now to upper handles so the person pushing the chair could grab it easily.

Hephaestion showed his plan to Titus who smiled broadly, patting him on the shoulder.

"This is magnificent Hephaestion, and if his arms are still strong he can make the wheels roll by himself" added Titus.

"Yes, that's why I added that brake. If the model is fine and works, then you can adapt a more comfortable chair, if this man is due to spend all his day in there"

"You are right, I will start right now. Thank you Hephaestion, you've been a great help" thanked Titus and handed him a nice short stool for Alexia as a birthday present.

Hephaestion, Alexia and some friends spent a wonderful day by the lake and, even though it was early autumn, the day was hot enough for a quick swim in the lake. The children played more games once they ate some sweet treats, brought by some women, two of them unmarried who were also seeking for Hephaestion's company, and when early evening arrived, they drank some hot sweetened milk and shared more sweets.

Hephaestion took each child to their homes and then, father and daughter returned happily to their own. However a strange feeling had nestled in his heart since his visit to Titus that early morning. He was thinking in the poor man with that weird illness caught in the east and a tiny but deep pang of pain attacked his heart. Alexia saw her father wince and asked him worriedly if he was not feeling well. Hephaestion took her into his arms and hugged her tight; he soothed her fear, retelling the story of the sick man.

"Who is the sick man, papa?" asked Alexia with concern. She had a lovely and caring heart inside her still small body.

"I don't know him, love, it is a friend of one of Titus's clients" he explained.

"May be you can help him, papa; you have a lot of healing herbs in our garden" she explained, looking at her father with her big two-coloured eyes.

"I am not a doctor, Alexia, and the man is being already taken care" he explained.

"This man comes from the east, just like king Alexander did some months ago; may be he can help him, you told me he also knows about herbs" Alexia said with her mind set on helping the sick man.

"But the king is not here, love. He must be already back in his palace in Babylon or on another campaign" he said, sighing deeply.

"Papa, do you miss him?" asked the girl.

"Why do you ask me that, Alexia? You know that I am not going anywhere" Hephaestion replied too quickly.

"I know, papa but I saw your eyes the day you two met again and they were so sad and the king's eyes were so bright less" she explained while curling even more on her father's lap.

"I miss him, it is true, I miss his friendship, we spent twenty years together but at the end we were not doing so well and so I decided to leave"

"But he was more than a friend, wasn't he?"

"Why do you ask that, Alexia?"

"Because he was wearing the other half of your pendant, papa" she explained.

"How do you know that?" he asked a bit frantic, touching the pendant that was still resting over his chest.

"Because as soon as I told him where he could find you, he kissed his half pendant and whispered Phai my love"

"Yes, Alexia; we had the same relationship your mother and your father had, with the difference that we are both men and we can't have children" explained Hephaestion, sighing deeply.

"But now you have me, papa" she reassured him.

"Yes, forever and one day more. I love you, Alexia, never doubt that, and I will never leave you" said Hephaestion with a whisper, he didn't want her daughter see him crumbling.

"I know papa but I want you happy" she insisted

"I am happy, love, don't worry" and kissed her forehead sweetly, he raised and tucked her into her bed.

When he saw that his little girl was already sleeping, he sat on the couch, next to the front window, and let his feelings run freely inside his mind and heart … and he felt that tiny empty hole inside his heart a bit bigger.

Autumn came and went and a very severe winter settled to stay for the following three months. Some woods of the barn roof had rotten so Hephaestion needed to replace them before that part of the roof fell down and ruined all the things stocked in there, especially the seeds.

Hephaestion rode into town with his cart and a bundled Alexia by his side. He arrived at Titus's workshop and entered there to buy the things he needed.

He realized that Titus was talking to a man so he waited until the conversation was over. Titus greeted the man and escorted him to the entrance of his shop, wishing him and his friend better luck.

When he reentered, Titus saw Hephaestion and his little girl standing there, waiting for him.

"And who is this beautiful girl, under that thick fur cloak?" asked Titus laughing.

"It's me, Alexia!" said the girl smiling.

"By the Olympians, you are such a gorgeous girl, your father will have problems keeping your suitors away from you" said Titus, winking at Hephaestion.

"I will never leave my papa, he needs me to be happy" she answered angrily; the mere idea of leaving her father was unthinkable.

"I am just joking, little wild cat" said Titus but he could clearly see the deep love of the girl for her father.

"Don't be rude, Alexia, Titus was just making a joke" said Hephaestion, who didn't like Alexia's statement about his happiness.

"If I knew you were here, I'd have introduced you to the man who I was talking to, he is the one with that sick friend I told you about and the owner of the chair with wheels"

"Call him back, I want to ask him about his friend, please" asked Alexia.

"Well, the man was in a hurry and he had just come to bring me a more comfortable couch because now his friend can't walk at all" said Titus with a sad expression in his face.

"Oh, poor old man, he must feel terrible" said Alexia.

"Not poor old man, he is only 38 years old but his friend thinks he will not reach his forties"

"He is as old as you, papa; he is still young to be so ill" said Alexia while looking at her healthy and strong father.

"Yes, he is but this man said that his friend had traveled almost all his life and he was not always careful with his health and things got worse when he lost his lover five years ago. He said that it was like he had lost his life wish, being more reckless inside the battle field and out of it" Titus repeated what the blonde man had told him in another visit to his shop.

"Another coincidence, he was a soldier as you were, papa but you are healthy while he is not" reflected Alexia while looking at her pensive father.

Hephaestion felt another of those strange pangs of pain in his heart whenever he thought about Alexander, as if they wanted to alert him of something else. He shook his head and decided to end the conversation by asking Titus for his wood and anything else he needed.

Alexia remained really quiet after the conversation and Hephaestion felt the same way. They got to their house and the little girl decided to lie on her bed, hugging her rag doll. Hephaestion sat on his couch by the window, with his head between his hands without realizing that daughter and father were thinking about the poor young man on the wheel chair.

Hephaestion knew it was a crazy idea the one he was thinking about but he decided that the next time he went to Titus's workshop he would ask for the sick man's name and address, he was sure his caring daughter Alexia would be glad to pay the sick young man a visit.

TBC


	6. Crossing the line of no return

_**Crossing the line of no return.**_

Spring was here with its longer and warmer days and Hephaestion's beautiful daughter was going to be seven soon and she was turning into a beautiful girl, she had his mother's features and Hephaestion had to assume that her height was from her father's side; Alexia was quite tall for her age and she made him remind of his own body at her same age, tall and thin as a twig as Alexander used to call him when they met for the first time. Another pang of pain invaded his heart and he had to sit to regain his breath. This time the pain had been stronger than before and he was a bit worried about it.

Alexia asked if she could have another stool for her birthday because the one she had was small. Hephaestion agreed with her idea, never seeing that behind that big smile there was another purpose.

They rode into town and went to Titus's. He was working on an expensive couch; its fabric was of deep red velvet and the wood was dark.

"Joy to you two" said Titus to Hephaestion and Alexia.

"What a nice couch and what beautiful carved legs" said Alexia, caressing the soft fabric.

"Yes, it is but the legs are off, I have to add the wheels" Titus explained.

"Is this couch for the ill man?" asked the girl with pain in her two coloured eyes.

"Yes, it is my dear and my client liked your idea for that head support at the back rest" added Titus talking to Hephaestion.

"I thought it could work because the man may want to rest his neck" Hephaestion said feeling happy that he could help the former soldier.

"Yes, the man said that it was thoughtful and he could only think that his lover would have come out with that same solution" Titus said while he went on working.

"But you said he had lost his wife and women don't work with wood" said Alexia thinking further.

"This ill man had a male lover, my girl, another soldier, well a General in fact" added Titus and glanced at Hephaestion that was quite pale.

"Do you know the soldier's name, Titus?"

"Yes, I have known it from the beginning but I was not allowed to say it" said the big man with sadness.

"The blonde man who accompanies him, is his name Ptolemy?" asked the brunette whispering.

Titus nodded slightly and looked at Hephaestion's eyes that were teary.

"Where can I find him?" asked the former General, his voice already crackling down.

"They have a big farm house three stadia from here, at the end of the main road, near the woods"

"Thank you, Titus. Let's go Alexia, we have someone to visit" said Hephaestion.

"What about my stool, papa?" asked Alexia who had not understood most of the conversation going between both men.

"We will come back for it on our way home" Hephaestion explained to his daughter while leaving the place.

Hephaestion rode up to the farm house and helped Alexia to dismount. A boy appeared immediately to take care of the mare and Hephaestion asked to see Ptolemy. The boy ran inside the house and an old woman came through the threshold and exclaimed:

"Now I am sure that my king will get better soon"

"Joy to you Lena" greeted Hephaestion to the old royal cook.

"And who is this beautiful girl?" she asked patting Alexia's cheek gently.

"She is Alexia, my daughter. Is Ptolemy around, Lena? I'd like to talk to him" said Hephaestion quickly so Lena could not see his nervousness.

"Yes, he is here, General, let me get him for you" she offered, patting his hand.

"Only Hephaestion, Lena, I am not a General anymore" he said.

"You will always be my General and Chiliarch, Sire" she replied with strength in her voice.

"Weren't you Alexander's Chiliarch, papa?" asked Alexia, trying to understand what was going on.

"Yes, my dear, I was" he said, sighing deeply.

"So if the blonde man is Ptolemy and his friend is the ill man, who was a soldier and caught his illness in the East, the ill man is Alexander!" she said after joining all the loose knots.

"Yes, Alexander is the ill man, love"

"Are we going to help him to recover, papa?" she asked with anxiety in her eyes and voice.

"I have told you before, I am not a doctor and even if I were, I cannot help someone who doesn't want to be cured" he explained nearly whispering.

Their conversation was interrupted by the arrival of Ptolemy, who embraced his dear friend tightly. The blonde man could not believe what his eyes were seeing, Hephaestion was there in Alexander's house and he had discovered the identity of the ill man he had unconsciously been helping.

Hephaestion introduced Alexia to Ptolemy who instantly fell for the little girl. He knelt so he could look at her eyes and told her that he had a little girl too. Hephaestion looked at him with surprise so Ptolemy explained that Thais had given him a beautiful daughter who was only three years old. They entered the kitchen and sat there, sharing news and gossips. Both men knew that talking about banalities would never hide the purpose of the visit but Ptolemy didn't want to rush Hephaestion and if his friend had not changed along these years, he would ask as soon as he felt more comfortable.

Lena, who was wise as well as old, asked Alexia if she wanted to go with her to pick up some apples for a pie, Alexia asked her father if she could go and he nodded and gave Lena a tiny smile, acknowledging her effort to leave both men alone.

Hephaestion remained silent for a while and then coughed to clear his voice; he looked at Ptolemy and asked:

"How is he?"

"I won't lie to you, Hephaestion, he is not doing well and every month he gets worse" Ptolemy replied.

"What is his illness? Titus told me something about his muscles but I need to know more" Hephaestion demanded.

"Nobody knows, not even the doctors who saw him in the East as soon as the first symptoms appeared" Ptolemy explained with pain in his voice.

"But was he injured with something? Stung by a poisonous animal? Didn't recover from an old illness? There must be a clue so we can help him" Hephaestion's voice sounded a bit anxious.

"The only thing is that after you left, he became more reckless and started to eat less and drink much more than he was used to. Philip warned him that if he didn't get a proper meal from time to time, his body would not be able to recover from his injures and a steady weakness in a restless body could cause his death. But you know how stubborn Alexander can be so he didn't pay too much attention to the doctor's advice and none of us were strong enough to convince him to take better care of himself; that had always been one of your duties and when you left, we finally realized how much you did for us and how many things you took care about Alexander's wellbeing and needs" said Ptolemy with a deep blush in his cheeks.

"Can I see him? Maybe I can convince him to take care of himself for the time being" asked Hephaestion with a tiny hue of hope in his still cerulean eyes.

"My brother, you have to realize that Alexander is dying and he has lost his desire to live, especially when he cannot move by himself and all he can do is to look through the window and that will end really soon"

"Why?"

"Because the muscles in his eyes are becoming too weak and lazy so he cannot focus his eyes on anything for a long time, I think he will lose his sight too."

"Please, I have to see him, and I need him to see him, even if it is for the last time" pleaded Hephaestion.

Alexia and Lena arrived with some red big apples and eggs to prepare the promised pie and both women saw the teary eyes in the handsome brunette's face. Alexia ran towards his father and hugged him tight, whispering in his ear that everything was going to be alright. Lena looked at him and told him that if there was a man on earth who could heal her king, that man was Hephaestion.

Ptolemy came back and told Hephaestion that Alexander was not feeling well and that he didn't want to see anyone. What the blonde companion silenced was that Alexander didn't want to see Hephaestion especially because the former king knew he would not be able to be quiet and not bombarded his former lover with tons of questions about his life without him. Alexander had never accepted that his Phai was married to another that was not him and that he had a daughter as a result of that love.

Alexander had also a hidden reason for not receiving him, his former arrogance and selfish attitude had made Hephaestion leave him and now that Hephaestion had found his place in the world, he had no right to ask anything from him. So Alexander decided to punish himself by denying his opportunity to see his only love and soul mate before he died; Alexander knew that his time was running fast and his thread of life would be cut sooner than later. He still loved Hephaestion too much and he did not want that his brunette remember him as the broken and ill man he had become.

Alexia saw the pain in her father's eyes and how they became bright less, as if the young brunette had lost his most important battle. She decided that she would do up to the impossible to help them to be together again, at least one more time before Hades came for the blonde man.

She would rescue his father and his soul mate like Hephaestion had done it for her; she was young but strong, she was a girl on a mission and she had already a friendly accomplice inside the house.

TBC


	7. Epilogue

_**This is the last part of this story, something that began as a simple drabble and took a life on its own. Hope you enjoy this epilogue and tell me what you think!**_

* * *

><p><em><strong>Crossing towards life. - Epilogue.<strong>_

One early morning a messenger arrived at Hephaestion and Alexia's house. He delivered a letter to the girl and told her that he would be back in three days for the response. Alexia agreed and went directly to the back garden to read it. Hephaestion found the situation weird but he dismissed the idea soon, Alexia would tell him about the letter in her own time. Even though Alexia was not his biological daughter, the girl had lived longer with him than with her own parents and she had adopted many of his attitudes and habits.

The girl was in deep silence most of the morning, coming and going from the little room where Hephaestion kept some of his scrolls to the herbs garden, always carrying the letter in her little hands.

Lunch was quiet too and Hephaestion realized that she was quite absorbed in her own thinking because she had never failed in doing little conversation during lunchtime. Hephaestion was getting a bit nervous and he decided that he would give her a little more time before he asked her what was going on.

Alexia excused herself as soon as lunch was over and she went back to her mission but now she was also carrying a scroll and a quill and she stopped every now and then to write something or to draw. However, Hephaestion could clearly see that she was not doing well with her task because in a moment she stopped and stomped her little feet against the floor and dried a stray tear quite violently from her cheek.

He decided that it was time she explained him what she was doing but he tried to ask her in the most diplomatic way.

"Is there anything I can help you with?" asked Hephaestion approaching his daughter and setting his hand on the small shoulder.

"Only if you promise not to get mad at me" whispered Alexia.

"I can't promise you before I know what you have been doing all day" explained the former General with a calm voice.

"I am researching about … about … healing herbs" stammered the little girl, whispering the last two words.

"Interesting investigation, Alexia, maybe I can help you, I took classes with Aristotle and he taught me a lot about it"

"I know, I have been consulting that thick book you have with the drawings and explanations but …"

"But what? Is there a problem?"

"Yes, I can't find the right herbs for his symptoms and I only have two days before they come for an answer"

"Well, now I am lost! Whose symptoms and what two days?" asked Hephaestion, trying to hide his anxiety.

"Alexander's symptoms, papa! I cannot stop thinking about him and he cannot die, not yet"

"It is very nice of you to try to help him but he is too ill and everybody dies, sooner or later …" he said with a breaking voice.

"I am tired of burying the people I love, I will not allow Hades near him, mark my words, father, I will save him and if you want to help me, fine; if not I will do it alone with Lena's help" said the girl with such decision in her voice that made the former General feel ashamed of himself.

Hephaestion had accepted Ptolemy's words too soon, without fighting and that was not his normal attitude towards the problems; he was known for discussing and trying to find the best solution even when the situation looked like a lost cause for the rest of the people; he had always managed to find a solution and he would not let his daughter down. The love he felt for Alexander came out from the dark and deep place he had put it in his heart and he let it bloom and grow and live again, feeding that tiny spark until it became a big flame.

Father and daughter worked without rest, reading and writing all the information they could get, always taking into account the list of symptoms and strange reactions that Lena had written down in her letter to Alexia.

When the messenger came back for a response, he found not only the reply but also two ready riders with two big bags attached to each saddle. They made their trip to the farm house and asked the barn boy not to announce their arrival.

Alexia dismounted and ran quickly towards the kitchen where she found Lena and both hugged tightly, smiling happily. The old royal cook asked the girl who had brought her and the vision of Hephaestion, loaded with his bags of healing herbs, put a big smile in the wrinkled face.

Ptolemy entered the kitchen as soon as he heard the commotion and another smile crowned now the tired face. The last month had taken a toll on all the house inhabitants and now with two more people to help they would be able to take a rest.

Hephaestion entered the darkened room and in the distance he could distinguish the lump on the bed, the man was resting on his side, in a fetal position, with his head resting on a soft pillow. Hephaestion sat on the bed by his side and let his fingers run the short locks, Alexander had cut his hair short when Hephaestion left the Army and he never let it grow again. The soft caresses on the scalp and temples made the former king moan in his sleep but a muffled and clear "Phai" escaped through his almost closed lips. The brunette took a deep breathe and leaned towards the body and set a kiss on the royal forehead, lingering in that gesture more than was necessary.

It took almost a week to gather all the herbs but as soon as they were all ready, Hephaestion took control of the kitchen and started the preparation of the concoctions; he knew that some of them would taste awful in their natural state so he asked Lena to mask them inside Alexander's food and drinks.

The former king of the known world was not responsive to them; in fact he started to feel worse and tended to throw out a lot after each meal. Hephaestion felt desperate, maybe he had made a serious mistake and he had accelerated the deteriorating process and Alexander would die sooner and it would be his fault.

But his little girl encouraged him to go on, repeating something that she had heard before "Things tend to get worse before they get better" and so Hephaestion continued until one day they saw a little improvement in Alexander's condition.

Everything had begun early that morning; Alexia was helping Lena in the kitchen when suddenly she started to laugh loudly, her father had just woken up after a whole night up, looking after an unconscious Alexander, and his hair was completely messed up, falling in front of his face, giving him the aspect of one of the furies in her myths book. She laughed louder when her father started to chase her, moving things and jumping onto chairs until he finally caught her and tickled her until she was lying on the floor, covering her stomach with her slender arms.

"Ptolemy, make Alexia shut up, my head is killing me" shouted Alexander from the bedroom with a renovate energy in his voice.

"Alright Alexander, be calm, please" Ptolemy shouted back and then turned round to look at his astonished friends.

"How did he know I was here?" asked Alexia, surprised that the blonde had recognized her voice.

"I don't know" answered Ptolemy.

"Have you talked to him?" asked Hephaestion.

"Yes, but he was unresponsive when I did it" Alexia explained.

"Aristotle once told me that people in a catatonic state could still hear what it is said to them so he should know we are here, me included" said Hephaestion quite nervously.

"Well, at least he had recovered his capacity to speak coherently and shout" said Lena smiling.

"Go and see him, Ptolemy, and ask him how he is feeling" commanded Hephaestion with urgency in his voice.

Ptolemy did as he was asked and when he opened the door he found Alexander on the big bed, with his head resting onto a huge pile of pillows but trying to move towards the edge of the bed. The tall blonde ran towards him and shouted him to be still. Alexander refused and set his eyes onto Ptolemy's face and the long nose man could assure that those two coloured eyes were no longer blind.

"Why do you want to get out of bed?"

"Because that little witch commanded me to stop being lazy and do something to recover my health. She called me spoiled brat and lazy bastard. She also hit my arm hard and shook my shoulders while whispering more insults"

"Did she do all those nasty things to you, oh powerful Alexander?" said Ptolemy laughing at his friend.

"Don't take her side, that little wench is dangerous; she threatened me by saying that if I didn't make amends with her father, she would ask Hades herself to take me sooner" said Alexander shuddering.

"By Zeus's balls, you have met your match in a little seven-year old girl!" said Ptolemy laughing loudly.

"Ptolemy, don't be stupid, Alexia must be five, my Phai went away nearly six years ago …" and suddenly the room was filled with a deadly silence.

"No, Alexia was seven last spring, Alexander, so think again …"

"She is not his daughter, he is not married!" said Alexander laughing.

"For someone who had been "dead" for a week, you are talking too much, my boy" said Lena, entering the chamber and carrying a pitcher of clear water and a bowl of stew.

"Lena, my loyal Lena, what would I do without you?" asked Alexander smiling at the old lady by his side.

"Ummm, die of starvation?" she asked cheerfully.

"I'm sure of that; now can I have my meal, please? And please bring that naughty girl here soon" asked Alexander.

"She is only a child, Alexander, don't be too rough, she is really worried about her father" Ptolemy explained.

"Is there something bad with Hephaestion?" asked the blonde with preoccupation.

"Apart from being worried about you?" said Ptolemy with mockery.

"I know that all of you had been doing something to improve my health and I can tell that I am feeling a bit better, so why is he still worried?" asked Alexander still confused.

"Because we thought we had lost you a week ago when things took a turn for the worse"

A knock on the wooden door announced the arrival of Alexia, who was immediately followed by a tired Hephaestion. Alexander set his two coloured eyes on cerulean ones and said firmly:

"I need to talk to Alexia alone … please"

"I am not leaving her alone with you if you are still mad at her" said Hephaestion.

"What I have to say is for her ears only, Phai" said Alexander with a tiny smile in his chapped lips.

"It is fine, papa. I will be right back soon" said Alexia, kissing her father's cheek.

Whatever Alexander said to Alexia during their long conversation was never repeated; Alexia, when asked later, said that if she said she would break the trust between patient and doctor and she would never do that to her Alexander.

After a long hour pacing along the kitchen, Hephaestion decided to go and confront Alexander. He marched towards the chamber, opened the door suddenly and froze at the entrance of the chamber: Alexia was asleep on Alexander's lap and the man had one arm snaked around the slender waist while his other hand was running along the girl's black tresses and occasionally caressed the tear stained face. Alexander nodded towards Hephaestion and the brunette got closer until he was standing by the bed. Alexander patted the space beside him and made Hephaestion sit there.

Silence invaded the room but their eyes did all the talking, they spoke about apologies, fears, incomprehension, pain, selfishness, regret but mostly of love and forgiveness.

Alexander looked at Alexia with a tender look in his eyes and whispered:

"She is an amazing girl and I am sure she will turn into a wonderful person, just like his father"

"Yes, she is, she really helped me to heal my wounds and I have tried to give her the love she lost when her parents died"

"She loves you very much, Phai, and she has promised me to help me too"

"I am sure she will, she is a natural healer"

"And what about you? Will you help me to be myself again so I can love you better this time?" whispered Alexander, blushing deeply.

"May be if you are a good patient …" answered Hephaestion smiling that particular smile only reserved for his Alexander.

"Will you kiss me better?" asked Alexander, feeling a bit bold.

Hephaestion leaned over and kissed Alexander on his forehead and whispered against the now cool skin:

"We will start little by little and we will cross the bridge again when we are both ready"

"No" said Alexander and Hephaestion looked at him with pain in his eyes, thinking that may be Alexander would never change.

"No?" asked Hephaestion defensively.

"No, when the three of us are ready" and taking Hephaestion's hand in his, he kissed it tenderly and then he turned round to kiss Alexia's forehead. "The three of us" whispered again before falling asleep.

Hephaestion looked at the two most important persons in his life and smiled. He took a warm blanket and covered them, leaving the chamber without making noise. When he was about to close the chamber door, he looked at them again and wondered how his life would have been if he had never crossed that bridge.

Finis.


End file.
